A completely random entry.
I was coming out of a fever.
THE MODERN HIDALGO: Entry_059.
Written: Thursday. November 7, 2019.
I’m honestly starting to question if I should continue on with writing journal entries. I feel like, I don’t know. I don’t feel anything when it comes to this journal. There’s no real and solid attachment for this thing. I don’t get rewarded doing this. It’s not like people actually read what I have to say here in this journal of mine. I live in a country that’s not supported by the Medium Partnership Program, so that sucks. I could never earn money from these journal entries of mine. I could never profit from it.
I could gain a following from this account, but that’s not happening at all as well, either. So you can see where the dilemma’s coming from, yeah? I don’t see a point as to why keep up writing in this Medium account of mine. I mean, I do have The Omnivault story. But that’s a separate entity on its own.
I dunno. I don’t know what I’m here for. I don’t know what’s keeping me going back. It’s not like I read other people’s articles here in Medium. It’s not like I can pay for “starred” articles. It’s not like I want to, as well. Cause most of the articles here are just a bunch of self-help articles, or some blog about what the president said in his tweets, or whatever. I’ve never woken up one morning, and thought to myself, “Jee Willickers! I wonder what’s new in Medium today.”
That never happens. Where am I going with this, anyway? I don’t even know.
I’ve been sick for quite a while. I dunno if I’ve said that before, but whatever. I was sick, and now I’m not. That’s why I’m writing this journal entry that you’re reading. So amazing.
I’ve been fixing The Omnivault chapters. I’ve been doing summaries of each chapter so that I could keep track of what’s going on. Cause a lot’s happened already for the past 11 weeks of me writing that story. And I have no idea where I want it to go. Which is probably what makes it fun, but makes it 10x more difficult to write. Cause I have to up-the-ante every single week in order to write a compelling story. That in itself is compelling, and exciting, and damn well frightening.
I wish I could focus on it more. But I feel like if I do, it’d damage the art of what I’m trying to do for this particular story. Cause the reason why it’s gotten to where it’s gotten, is because of the randomness of it all. Sure, I’m following a pattern, but it’s not like I’m preparing the next chapter before I even write about it.
Where was I?
I was able to do a morning walk today. Which is nice. I was able to get myself out of my bed at a very early hour, and just go outside of the house, and started walking.
I didn’t walk around UST this time around. I instead walked a straight line towards Sun Mall, and then walked back home. I’m probably gonna do it again tomorrow, if I’m lucky enough again to get myself out of the bed in the morning.
It’s a start, I guess. So I should congratulate myself on that…by waking up again tomorrow morning and do the same thing. And also start exercising again, since I’m done taking the meds that I needed to take for the sick…ness that I went through.
So there’s that. What else?
Yeah, like I said, I just kept on re-editing The Omnivault. I’m gonna write another chapter by tomorrow. Still gonna keep it in a 1000 word-count mark for now. I’ll push it to 1,500 by the 16th chapter.
The story’s looking good so far. I’ve made a couple of mistakes within the first few chapters. I sort of forgot a few minor details that I wrote about. But no matter, if it was forgotten, then it wasn’t something important to remember…or am I just bullshitting myself. I dunno.
Anyway, the story. I dunno. I love writing it, but at the same time, I don’t know where it’s headed. I don’t know what to write about next, or what new characters to put in the story, or when to put them in the story.
Basically, I could definitely say that this story is based off of my high-school life. Or the life that I had around that time. Specifically around 3rd year High School. But then again, I’ve altered a lot of things that actually happened. And also the chronology of when certain things happened, or certain people were met, or certain friendships were made.
But looking at it from a far distance, I could say that it’s solid enough for me to just say “fuck it”, and move forward with what’s currently happening with the story.
There’s still a lot of characters that I want to make, that are obviously based on the people I know in real life. I also want to add a bunch of Easter Eggs about my other past stories. But doing that might ruin the story. That’s why I’m hesitating.
For now, I’m on a solid path. Still carving out the complicated dynamics between the five main characters (so far):
- Of course, there’s the dynamic between the trio: Toby, Tom, and Drew.
- There’s also the dynamic between:
- Toby and June.
- June and Drew.
- Drew and Amanda.
- Amanda and Tom.
- June and Amanda.
I’m suddenly thinking of if it’s a good idea talking about The Omnivault here in The Modern Hidalgo, when clearly nobody’s reading that shit anyway.
But then again, if it’s interesting to me, then it should be interesting for others, right? Right…Right? I dunno.
I haven’t even had coffee, and I feel like I’ve just written a completely random journal entry for today.
God dammit, I miss drinking coffee. Not the warm kind of coffee. I like my coffee cold and from a bottle bought in your nearest 7/11.
The Kopiko brand one. Black Coffee.
Sponsor me, please.